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My Sexual User's Guide v. 1.0
Posted:Jun 28, 2018 11:27 am
Last Updated:Aug 9, 2018 3:52 pm
6304 Views

PHILOSOPHY To be honest, I still struggle with sexual trauma of my past, but as I get older, I'm embracing that I'm a sexual being deserving of pleasure and wanting to give pleasure. Sex is natural, nudity is natural and our bodies- what they can and can't do aren't anything to be ashamed of. Nothing wrong with what your desires are. Sex isn't a weapon to be used to coerce or harm anyone emotionally, physically, or psychologically. Sex should be a consensual act between adults of legal age. There should be no pressure to have sex if a person isn't ready. I believe that people shouldn't be punished for consenting, and then changing their minds later on; their decision should be respected. I believe that the government should fuck off when it comes to what two or more consenting adults do in their bedroom. I believe women should have more sexual freedom, and that their bodies aren't objects or ornaments. I believe that not all men oversexed, and that some do want to have sex when they feel ready. Just like I dont believe that all women are demure and have a low sex drive.

ORIENTATION:
I'm straight, boo. Because I dislike how men tend to treat women and I'm very vocal about that doesn't mean I'm going to switch teams. Now what type of man, the less touched by toxic masculine stereotypes the better.

PREFERENCES

*A no pressure daytime meet in public, i.e the mall, starbucks (or a better coffee spot) or over lunch.

*I don't have a car, so I prefer being picked up. If you don't have a car, I can make it by uber, but this would have to be at the top of the month.

*To host at my place, since I feel safer and have the home advantage. Right now I live with family with a religious mom and two small children (not mines), so if you can pop for a room, that's fine. If you can host at your place, even better.

*To have conversation, a massage or cuddle; I have anxiety disorder and before sex is when I'm the most nervous. Even if I'm into the guy, I need reassurance and it's nothing personal against the guy.

*Proper hygiene, a clean space and clean clothes. I always shower, brush my teeth, etc, and trim my pubic hair (unless I'm lazy) and clean my area before meeting someone, and I expect the same.

*To have antibacterial wipes or hand sanitizer on hand, and to not use spit as lube since I'm prone to yeast infections and BV. Not a neat freak, just careful when it comes to germs and sexual contact.

*If we haven't agreed ahead of time that it's a casual but "monogamous" thing with both of us having been tested recently- I HIGHLY prefer using condoms. I have an IUD, but the nature of the device won't allow me catching STI.

*To have a slightly warm-ish room, because I feel I perform better when I'm not cool or freezing.

*To have water or gatorade and snacks on hand. Because you work up and appetite and you sweat, duh. Also because no one can perform on an empty stomach, and I also get low blood sugar.

*To at least go more than one round and have more than one orgasm, if possible. Of course there's schedules to consider, but in general I don't normally care for just one go around. Even if it's just helping me while I get my ownself off.

*To please each other equally; I don't do selfish lovers or "pillow princess" shit. I give back as good as he gives me. If you can't, don't expect to see me again.

*To use toys and sexual aids (like lube for example) to enhance the experience, and not to be shamed or embarrassed or denied using toys and aids. (some guys have tried to get me off by sheer will, but I do need outside stimulation that's more than just vaginal penetration and mindless thrusting)

*Boundaries and consent, and to discuss anything we'd like to do before entering into a sexual relationship. Not forced to do anything I don't want to, and the guy to have the same expectation.

TURN ONS (physical)
Toned shoulders
Graceful necks
Forearms
Brunettes - not dirty blonde, or plain brown hair but rich and dark brown, dark auburn
"Salt & pepper" brunettes
Bald guys with groomed beards
Groomed beards and stubble
Abs
Full lips or well-shaped mouths
Freckles and moles
Pale, but not transclusent skin
Curly or wavy hair
Thick and groomed eyebrows
Husky/thick built men, i.e "big handsome men", "dad bods", pre-Marvel Chris Pratt, "teddy bears"
Swimmer's build, i.e tall, lean and athletic or short, athletic and lean
Dimples
Eyelashes
Bubble butts
Toned calves and thighs
Scars (depending on the guy and where the scars are located)
Adonis belts
**keep in mind, any of these in combination and not all are set in stone

TURN ONS (sexual)

Grunts, long and vulnerable moaning, groans
Uncut cock
Hangy ballsacks
Guys who pre cum
Grinding against my backside or crotch during foreplay
Ear play: heavy breathing, licking, lightly stroking, lobe nibbling
"Begging" to be inside me
Breast and nipple play: licking, nibbling, pinching, kneading, groping, sucking, etc
Nipple play and making out
Displays of strength (if at all possible): picked up and carried, yanked towards him, being pinned down during sex
Necking

TURN OFFS/ OFF LIMITS
Pushiness/impatience
Negging, begging, any form of manipulation
R*** fantasies
Scat, blood, spit
Incest fantasies
Bestiality
Children
Bad hygiene (unkempt hair and or facial hair, long nails, dirty clothes, BO, untrimmed or unshaved pubes, stank breath)
Lying about important things, i.e having a partner, having children
Disregard for sexual health, i.e not using condoms
Sexually aggressive from the jump
Being called "sweetie" or any term of endearment without knowing me
For White guys, asking me "If I ever been with a white guy" or basically implying that your interest in me is for bucket list purposes

FETISHES

Ass play: rimming, fingering, groping, biting
Bulges, hard-ons, dick prints and outlines
Creampies
Oil play - coconut oil/baby oil/lubed handjobs
Spanking - ass and breasts
Sensory stimulation: fabrics across the nipples and clit for example, aural stimulation: distinctive voices, being vocal
Nipples
Facesitting
Hickies
Parked car sex
Passive exhibitionism
Hands and finger worship (if he has nice hands)
Biting: wrists, upper back, butt, collar bone

Favorite positions
Doggy style, cowgirl, missionary, spooning position, belly down w/ guy on top
10 Comments
I'm not paying for sex!
Posted:Oct 17, 2018 8:58 am
Last Updated:Oct 18, 2018 6:05 am
157 Views

I find it HILARIOUS as shit when men say this dripping with pride and indignation. They're above that, and won't do it when accosted by working women on the site. That's fair. It's fair because prostitution isn't legal ( at least for the common man in the United States) and probably never will be anytime soon. However, why is this a thing with men on business, where they roll into your town for a day or two with a hard dick, expecting that you will be down or even care about wanting to bang a stranger? From experience in my younger more sluttier days, instant sex with someone I just met is only good for the guy. I leave wondering what the hell was that.

Logic and reasoning isn't a horny man's strong suit. But it makes more sense to hire a sex worker who is paid to put up with your mediocre skills and performance, than a woman who is here of her own volition. Yet men beyond the legal ramifications turn their nose up at sex workers which are there for just what you need, but you soft coerce female members into the same thing: a hit and run session just to get your rocks off while you're in town. And there's a 99.9% chance you will be shot down because free will kicks ass. And most if not all the women here want more than a few pumps and then are allowed to leave. Hey guys! If you haven't already been told...not everyone will be into what you want to do. Most of all, and I know that it absolutely kills you inside to know this, but women are people, too. Wow. So much truth.

I figure if you're on business, make it worth her time and inconvenience or shut the fuck up, get some lube and jerk it to all the free porn you have here and elsewhere.
17 Comments
Hooking up vs proper dating and sex?
Posted:Oct 14, 2018 10:44 am
Last Updated:Oct 16, 2018 8:03 pm
267 Views

I think I'm going to ask this to maybe prove a point with places like this, and maybe bridge the divergent thinking that you can't "court" a person for sex like you can if it were just to date for a serious romantic relationship....

The question being, on average: How long does it take to progress to a sexual relationship during serious dating vs the time it takes to progress to a sexual relationship in a casual dating situation? Or is there no difference between the two? If you don't or can't do either, just pretend or think back to the last serious relationship you had vs the last hookup. Then compare.

Did you take your time to "court" the person either way? Or rush into both? Or rush with one and take your time with the other? 🤔

Why I ask is because people here often think that hooking up is a speedy, easy and simple process. When in reality, nothing is instant especially when you want it to be honest, satisfying and rewarding. Which is why so many people from here are bitching about "fakes, flakes, and phonies", people being not who they represented. I know for a fact it's that way on vanilla dating sites, and if so, some people back out or think of an excuse to leave early. I know that it's the same with hooking up, but no one's going to accuse you too harshly (I'd like to think) if you back out of a romantic date that you know has been disappointing. With sex, people I think take it really personal because it challenges their sexual skills and physical attraction. Some people, instead of looking like a prude, ignore obvious red flags either for their own pleasure or not to look stuck up. We'd rather put up with shitty sex than hold out and get to know someone to avoid any disappointment.

At least that's my opinion. And my opinion is probably wrong. So how do you approach the whole process?
10 Comments
Gaining and missing connections..
Posted:Oct 13, 2018 12:12 am
Last Updated:Oct 14, 2018 9:15 am
354 Views

Anyone remember the now defunct "missed connections" section of That Guy's Place, that thanks to an anti trafficking law no longer exists along with the other personals? I know that TGP was covering its ass, but damn. Anyway, I wish it existed because I need to write to someone. A pizza delivery guy.

You see, I'm a frequent customer of the place in question and when he first appeared, I almost embarrassed myself, by saying the classically awkward reply of, "You too" to his "Enjoy your food!" I know I know but he was cute with an inviting smile, dark brown hair, mustache and goatee. He had gauges in his ears and was very friendly. I could mistaken friendliness for interest, but we had some small talk a few times. Especially one night where I was high as a kite and we talked about our smoking apparatuses. I remember none of it barely. Second time before last time, he parted and glanced back with a little smile. This time, more small talk, and there was a hesitancy for a fraction of a minute before he went back to his truck. I cursed myself tonight because I was shy then and even shy tonight despite being high.

I had proposed a little idea in my head that next time I order online, I was just going to write in the "additional instructions" to send him specifically...only if he was working that night. Bold, but I don't know how much longer me and my family would be living here. I have to shoot my shot.

Meanwhile in the ongoing discussion of "Papi", my new married friend. We played a little 20 questions day before last, and dammit! I didn't think that it was possible for me to be anymore attracted to him um hello! He grows orchids, he used to practice martial arts, he enjoys musicals, has good taste in poets, he likes cats, he loves Elfquest and Watchmen graphic novels. Eerily, he loves the same entree I do: lechon asado with black beans and sweet plantains. Besides the stuff I just learned about him, last week he told me about the birth of his oldest daughter. He tells stories better than I fucking do! And he's a writer as well.

I told him that "there is no god", because of course someone warm, entertaining, passionate, interesting, intelligent, who's crazy about his kids, affectionate, terribly geeky and heart swellingly romantic with the whole long walks on the beach bit is of course...OF COURSE married. Married and his wife wants nothing to do with him sexually or affectionately...but also doesn't allow him to have fun on the side, either. Nor does she want to do to counseling. He could just do it anyway, but his wife would probably tear his kids away from him. I'm not risking that, because as much as I'm smitten with him, I'm not an idiot, nor heartless.

FUCK. MY. LIFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Really. Why me?

Goddamned to fucking lonely single woman eating take out and watching Netflix H E L L. Why does my luck have to fuck me over!!! It seems like he feels the same way concerning me also.

I know what you're thinking, and I know that I should take a chance on the pizza guy. Yeahoksure, but I talk to "Papi" at least five times a week, and I don't order much as I talk to my friend.

That said, I'm going to try again with the pizza guy. Because I know I don't stand a chance with the married guy.
7 Comments
Not gone with the wind
Posted:Oct 10, 2018 9:29 am
Last Updated:Oct 11, 2018 4:56 am
529 Views

So if you hadn't had your head up your butt, you know that a category 3 hurricane has or will be here to fuck shit up. Fortunately, the worst of it is not hitting my county, but I can't speak for Leon County and further northeast. Leon County is where the capital of Florida, Tallahassee is...and where "Veggie", my FWB resides. I checked on him yesterday, and he's fine and prepared. Him and his granny have food and supplies--I figured him being a chef for a living, yeah he would. He's also tough, he's survived a severe car crash and died in the ambulance temporarily, so I doubt a storm scares him.

As far as down here, we're ill prepared, just in case- because my family is a hot mess. not, but they are (at least when it comes to preparedness) . Blame our situation: we're trying to get up enough money to move out and secure residence elsewhere, so there's that. not even sure about that - everyone except the youngest sibling has contributed, because pot is a priority for her over having shelter. Plus my mom isn't going to put her out again...some retarded motherhood thing about her finding herself because "she doesn't know better". Yeah, she can "find herself" a new residence if she doesn't get with the program and contribute.

Anyway, enough about my dysfunctional family. If you have a little scratch, please donate to the Red Cross. I already donated to my local ASPCA because cats, dogs and bunnies > humans. And I'll probably donate more very soon.
8 Comments
Debunking a myth about married guys....
Posted:Oct 8, 2018 4:47 pm
Last Updated:Oct 12, 2018 11:17 pm
786 Views

This is probably going to be a huge dumpster fire, nuclear hot mess of a post, but I just want to debunk a long held myth about something. It came to me when I was talking to my married friend, "Papi". When we first met, we had a brief midnight cruise to where he bought me dinner from Sonic, and we spent time talking in between. He seemed engaged and fun to talk to. I remember that he opened my side of the car, getting in and exiting. He also walked me to my door. From then on out, he kept in contact with me to where we met again, and had a brief sexy dalliance. Still, he keeps in contact with me. He's physically and verbally affectionate - calling me "my love" numerous times, and lavishing me with compliments and praise and encouragement. We made a few plans for dates, but his life comes first...of course.

I know that he probably does this because his wife isn't receptive anymore, and he knows that I'm sprung on him, but is it true? Do ALL married men treat their affairs wonderfully in and out of bed, because the wife can't or won't care? Or am I one of many rare..ish exceptions?

I wonder how this post will play out...
16 Comments
Using natural looks to an advantage?
Posted:Oct 6, 2018 5:07 pm
Last Updated:Oct 10, 2018 9:01 am
1004 Views

I don't have a good title for this, so I'm going to give a little bit of context with what I mean. So my mother was going through clothes to give away, she gave me some jeans, because she can't fit a size 22. I said that I probably could, so she tossed them to me. I then remarked that I was a size 22, but pointing at my stomach and bust, but a size 28 up top. She joked that maybe I was just "weird shaped", and I shot back that maybe it was her "shitty genes" she passed onto me. Because my mom and two sisters all have definitive hip to waist ratio, but me and my other sister are very top heavy with narrow hips (aka "apple shaped").

However, I added confidentiality that being as chesty as I was got me by. Because "men will do almost anything for a woman with big tits" , I plainly stated. And I will confess that I do use them to my advantage, which is funny, because I remembered getting incensed at my friend in Chicago about him encouraging me to do that.

I mean I already do, it's just that I wanted to not "sully my brand" but I do. I totally, honestly do use my natural endowment. I mean I don't go out in public with plunging tops, but then again, I don't have to. I'm pretty obvious even in a normal tee shirt. 🙄

My boobs get most of the attention, but guys have commented on my eyes and smile, and that's gotten their share of messages...

But men will do a lot for titties. Not big time things, but I've gotten my rent paid, groceries, bills, my mom's tires on her car replaced and a new computer! Relatively expensive dinners, getaways to South Florida and Disney World, respectively. Mini shopping sprees and sex toys, of course. Never stuff like lingerie and flowers, but I'm still young.

Before any resentful men think that I scam on guys just for stuff - no. I never asked them for anything. These were guys I was FWB with or dating. I guess letting them play with my breasts compelled them to 🤷

So, ladies and perhaps gentledudes - have you ever used your looks or natural endowments to your advantage? What did people do for you or bought you as a result?
11 Comments
Sexual favoritism?
Posted:Oct 5, 2018 9:18 am
Last Updated:Oct 7, 2018 11:57 am
1248 Views


The accompanying picture gives me pause, and a question. Are there certain sexual acts that you will do with certain partners, but not with others? Is it based on how they treat you, or you just have fun with all partners no matter how you feel or don't feel about them?

I don't gag on every guy's cock when it comes to blowjobs. I just don't, unless I feel attraction and want to please him. Swallowing just the same as gagging - if I like you, I swallow. If I don't, I spit. I love anal sex, but it's all down to my state of mind and energy levels, also how long I've been with a guy and whether I trust him or not to be overzealous.

Those are just a few examples. What are yours, if you have any?
8 Comments
Why can't we be friends?
Posted:Oct 4, 2018 12:06 pm
Last Updated:Oct 5, 2018 4:14 pm
1318 Views

You know, when I get friend requests on here, I assume it's at least a few people that are regulars to my blog, maybe someone I've spoken to a few times via message. Not some random disembodied penis, hoping to get access to the private nudes folder that's reserved for people who haven't made themselves into freeloaders. I know that you're not supposed to take this place seriously, and there's women on here who collect men like nail polish colors and underwear sets, but that ain't me. That ain't me because it's shallow and I'm not shallow.

This place is indeed fun and fantasy, but I've met at least a few people who made an impact beyond the superficial. One that actually remained. Ya'll know who. What we have transcended nudie pics (even though we exchanged a few when we're in the mood) but overall we talk, share, fight and love. Like friends.

Anyway all I ask is that a person takes some time to get to know me and in the absence or not in the absence of chemistry, we talk and get to know each other. Then maybe I can add you.

So do you care about who and why you add friends, or do you just collect them because it's not a big deal?
14 Comments
Fellas, do you love her all month long?
Posted:Oct 2, 2018 4:17 pm
Last Updated:Oct 3, 2018 11:09 pm
1397 Views


I've polished off a sleeve of dollar store Thin Mints, I'm so irritable that I can't even stand someone thinking too loudly because it irks me, I'm wearing black sweats and old underwear and all I want to do is sleep, eat dairy, sodium-rich junk and chocolate. Take a guess what's going on with me?

If you guessed period, aka: The Red Tide, Crimson Wave, Being on the Rag, Time of the Month, Aunt Flo the Red Menace, or one I just made up: Merciless Bloodshed in the Southlands...then you'd be right!

I don't mind them, because once upon a time before my IUD, I didn't have any at all, and when I did it was like the prom scene from Carrie. They leaked through good jeans and shorts, undies, bedsheets...dreadful, dreadful nasty business. Nowadays, regular and like clockwork starting off heavy and tapering off, instead of the hallway scene from The Shining. (these 70s horror movie references working for anyone?)

Anyway with some women, they dont want to be touched, looked at or even have a man breathe in their general direction, but me? Get some old towels to lay on the mattress, because I want to get wit'cha! As long as I've been having sex, I want to say that a small minority doesn't mind period sex. The rest vanish into mist, so that means when the urge hits, I have to masturbate. BOOOOOO!

So, are you for period sex, gentlemen? Or nay?

It's natural cramp relief if anything, and it's not like you're putting your mouth down there, just your dick with a condom on (I hope), it does wash off and it's kind of kinky if that's your thing. Lastly, men with a mature attitude know that it's just nature doing its thing and that menses is just a part of life.
12 Comments
Sexy Party Weekend Make your weekend Sexy: The Drinking Game
Posted:Oct 1, 2018 6:49 pm
Last Updated:Oct 3, 2018 9:30 am
1507 Views

The rules are as follows: get a shot glass and your favorite liquor of choice.

When you see a profile with no picture or information, take a shot.

When marital status is missing, take a shot.

When someone sends you a message with just the word "Hey", take a shot.

When their default pic is one of tits, ass, pussy or dick, take a shot.

When someone says, "We all know what we're here for", take a shot.

When you're told to "Go back to eharmony, this is a fuck site!" Take a shot.

When someone complains about the fakes and flakes, take a shot.

When someone 30+ years older than you messages you, take a shot.

When someone old enough to be your kid or grandkid messages you, take a shot.

When you see a couple's profile where the woman is bisexual and the man is straight, take a shot.

When anyone says in their profile that they're looking for "fun", take a shot.

When you see a profile asking for someone "HWP", but the member asking is overweight, take a shot.

When you see a profile of a married person mention "a sexless marriage", take a shot.

When a screen name mentions "BBC/BWC", take a shot.

When someone messages you from out of town wanting a vacation hookup, take a shot.

CONGRATS, YOU ARE NOW DEAD FROM ALCOHOL POISONING.
15 Comments
You want a dominant woman, until you don't..
Posted:Oct 1, 2018 10:53 am
Last Updated:Oct 1, 2018 3:57 pm
1435 Views

Afternoon, here's another "man hating" post from yours truly. Because we all know that calling people out on their bullshit, indescrepancies or having an opinion, means that I hate penis. Hokay!

Anyway, so I had got this in my inbox last night:

"Hi there. Any interest in a submissive bi white male to use and to entertain you?"

Can I ask why that's an appeal, because it goes against the rugged, individualistic, independent and manly ideal of what men really areeeee! * thumps chest mightily * Real men don't let women boss THEM around! Of course this is sarcasm by the way, you know.

I'm not saying that there aren't men that defer and genuflect, but it seems like it comes from a selfish place. There's real Dommes who do this for a living and are more experienced and willing. Instead of hitting up some one like me who has an assertive streak, thinking that me being a "pillow princess" is what a "dominant woman" is all about. I think besides being against having to pay for it, dinguses like this guy probably want a more controlled environment, as in controlled by him. To get whacked on the ass by a cat-o-nine tails and being barked at to lick her boots while he's on all fours wearing a leash is probably not that appealing to him. This is why him and others of his ilk send this fuckery to my inbox.

That's your fantasy, bruh-- pushing disinterested women like me into roles that I made no implication of on my profile, so YOU can get your rocks off. Real Dommes don't play. You'd be a paypig with your Johnson locked up in some elaborate chastity device if you fucked with a real Dominant woman.

But men like a chase and challenge. Being in a situation where he doesn't have that much isn't appealing or worth it. Because heaven forbids you get the kind of woman that you asked for?
3 Comments
Yeah, but what have you done for her lately?
Posted:Sep 30, 2018 2:57 pm
Last Updated:Oct 4, 2018 10:56 am
1745 Views

I was going to post something else, but this topic kinda butted in first...

As we all know, Sexy Party Weekend Make your weekend Sexy is crawling with unhappily married/long term partnered men, with the same old song and dance concerning why he's unhappy with his marriage/relationship. Lack of sex, DUH! So because of that, he has to find his satisfaction somewhere else. They say she's just not interested, but they never say WHY , just a general or vague reason why she isn't, or saying she doesn't want to talk about it.

Yet, he never explains his side as in anything he's doing or done that turns her off to intimacy. In the absence of health issues or terminal illness, what have you done? Maybe you do have sex, but you stopped being passionate about it. Maybe communication has broken down. Maybe you don't do as much to entice her. Maybe you're just obtuse - she knew that, but married you anyway. So many reasons, factors and variables that can't be boiled down to one blog.

I'm not saying that women can't be mean and abusive withholding sex as a punishment or bargaining chip, but in the case of nothing like sickness, etc maybe you should hold up your end? Own up to what you might not be doing, either? Just a thought.
20 Comments

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